What Do You Get When You Cross Math Impaired Liberals With Irony Impaired Liberals?

Obviously, you get Move On Dot Org!


The Move On Webley

Consider the following email:

Dear MoveOn member,
We've developed a breakthrough strategy to destroy the National Rifle Association's credibility in Washington: gun owners committed to fighting for gun control.
You see, the truth is that only a tiny minority of gun owners actually belong to the NRA—and most of them don't even agree with it. If the silent majority of gun owners who support gun control speak out, they'll blow the NRA's cover, so we can finally take action to prevent gun violence and save lives—including by helping President Obama issue an executive order this month to close the background check loophole.
Here's our plan: After the shooting at Umpqua Community College in Oregon last month, MoveOn launched Gun Owners for Gun Control, which now has 32,260 members. Next week, we're bringing 15 of them—thoughtful, experienced, and responsible gun owners, including former NRA members—to Washington, D.C., for meetings with the White House, members of Congress, and the media.
But we still need to raise the money to cover the cost of the gun owner delegation, to take the message they deliver in D.C. and get it out across the country, and then to continue organizing this incredibly powerful group of MoveOn members...

The NRA says it has 5 million dues-paying members, which may be inflated, but still is just 6 and 7 percent of U.S. gun owners..."

Math impaired? Irony impaired? Both?

According to Mooooooove On, the NRA is supposedly an illegitimate organization to represent all gun owners, because at 5 million members, give or take, they only represent 6-7 per cent of American gun owners. If we believe Move On's numbers, that would mean roughly 83 million gun owners they want to disarm, (with an average of about four to five guns each). So if the NRA doesn't represent the American gun owner, who does? Why, that would be Gun Owners for Gun Control, of course, with 32,260 members (stop laughing!)...15 of which are going to testify at meetings of math impaired Congress Critters who will be suitably impressed. The entire membership of Moooove On's anti gun organization is approximately .00388 % of that 83 million. And 15 is .04649 % of .00388 %.

You see where this is going? Five million is way too small a group, not at all representing all gun owners, so let's choose a much smaller sample! And those fifteen hand picked Move On shills will represent all of us! As long as they espouse a liberal agenda, they must be the real deal!

Oh, and they're going to destroy our credibility? Full disclosure: I am a Life Member of the NRA, have been for years.  I'm the NRA, and I have the solution. Since five million is too small a sample and thirty two thousand is better, I have started an organization of gun owners consisting of just me and my grandmother! Since poor grannie passed away some years ago, it's just me to be the final arbiter of all things guns. I will determine what is and what is not "common sense" when it comes to gun laws.

But we still need to raise the money to cover the cost of the gun owner delegation (ME), to take the message I deliver (actually, it's more of a pronouncement) in D.C. and get it out across the country, and then to continue organizing this incredibly powerful individual, who is both an NRA and MoveOn dot org member. (I must be a member! That's how they address me in all their emails to me!)

Behold the only man to stand in the gap between these two diametrically opposed groups. And be sure to send in your dough! I ain't flying to DC in coach!