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Most people think Hillary set up a personal email server for corrupt reasons, but it’s also possible she’s just an idiot with bad advisors.

-Frank J. Fleming

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If you want to close the wage gap, you’ll need to force women to do things like choose higher wages over flexible hours.

-Frank J. Fleming

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What if the reason Hitler was so malicious was because of all the time travelers who tried to kill him as a baby?

-Frank J. Fleming

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It would be easier to take Trump supporters seriously if they stopped doing insane, incoherent things like supporting Donald Trump.

-Frank J. Fleming

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So 90% of people passionately believed in this bill and Obama couldn’t get it passed??? Man he sucks at being president.

— Frank J. Fleming

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People are really sure that if we pass the assault weapons ban, something useful will be done, even though it’s a ban on deadly weapons in the same way that prohibiting flame decals would be a ban on fast cars.

-Frank J. Fleming

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“How in the world are we supposed to make fun of an out-of-touch elitist who thinks he’s smarter than everyone and who has written multiple memoirs despite never having accomplished one useful thing in his entire life? It’s impossible!”

Really, if you can’t make fun of Obama, you need to turn in your comedian badge right now. You can keep the gun.

-Frank J. Fleming, on why Liberals Just Aren’t Very Funny

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"You can't insult someone into supporting your candidate."

-Frank J. Fleming

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How can you live in America and not own a gun? That’s like living in France and not owning stinky cheese.

-Frank J. Fleming

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“Still, we’re assured of how smart Obama is and that he’ll tell us his next genius idea as soon as he gets his tongue unstuck from the flagpole.”

-Frank J. Fleming

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The left are very certain there’s dirt in the Palin emails because they know how shocking their own private emails would be if made public.

-Frank J. Fleming

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So the Democrats sucked. But not just plain old, usual politician sucked, but epic levels of suck where it’s hard to find an analogue in human history that conveys the same level of suckitude. It was sheer incompetence plus arrogance — and those things do not complement each other well. We’re talking sucking that distorts time and space like a black hole.

It’s Godzilla-smashing-through-a-city level of suck — but a really patronizing Godzilla who says you’re just too stupid and hateful to see all the buildings he’s saved or created as he smashes everything apart.

-Frank J. Fleming

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Marines have always been environmentally conscious, but now they’re starting a new program that should really make liberals happy. They’re going to be selling lifetime carbon offsets. You pay them their fee, and the Marine will then kill someone in a foreign land, effectively offsetting your entire carbon footprint.

The Air Force plans to get into the act too. For a fee, they’ll permanently offset the carbon footprint of an American business by blowing up factories in another country.

-Frank J. IMAO

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What if we could nominate Iron Man as our presidential candidate? He couldn't be attacked on his personal life because people wouldn't know who he is. What they would know about him is that he can blow up tanks. And if you have Iron Man in a debate with a Democrat, who are people going to vote for: the guy in the cool robot suit with rocket boots or the whiny Democrat? That's why we need to develop cool robot suits (the technical terms for suits that make you look like a robot) and instead of deploying them militarily use them in a political setting. You don't have to worry about Democrats doing the same thing because robot suits have weapons on them and Democrats are scared of those.

-Frank J. IMAO