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"There are lies, damn lies and statistics."

- Mark Twain

Quote du jour

"The political and commercial morals of the United States are not merely food for laughter, they are an entire banquet."

- Mark Twain

Quote du jour

I was seldom able to see an opportunity until it had ceased to be one.

- Mark Twain

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Ah, well, I am a great and sublime fool. But then I am God’s fool, and all His work must be contemplated with respect.

-Mark Twain

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"Cold! If the thermometer had been an inch longer we'd have frozen to death."

-Mark Twain

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"New Year's Day now is the accepted time to make your regular annual good resolutions. Next week you can begin paving the road to hell with them as usual."

- Mark Twain

Quiptoon du jour

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"You can't depend on your judgement when your imagination is out of focus."

-Mark Twain

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“Training is everything. The peach was once a bitter almond; cauliflower is nothing but cabbage with a college education.”

― Mark Twain

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“The two most important days in your life are the day you are born and they day you find out why.”

-Mark Twain

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"I like a good story, well told. That is the reason I am sometimes forced to tell them myself."

- Mark Twain

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A man's character may be learned from the adjectives which he habitually uses in conversation.

- Mark Twain

Quiptoon du jour

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"A mighty fine dog he was, too. He weren't no common dog. He weren't no mongrel! He was a composite!"

-Mark Twain

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"A man who carries a cat by the tail learns something he can learn in no other way."

— Mark Twain

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Action speaks louder than words but not nearly as often.

- Mark Twain

Quote du jour

"The political and commercial morals of the United States are not merely food for laughter, they are an entire banquet!"

-Mark Twain

Quote du jour

I was seldom able to see an opportunity until it had ceased to be one.

- Mark Twain

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Only kings, presidents, editors, and people with tapeworms have the right to use the editorial 'we.'

-Mark Twain

Quote du jour

The first of April is the day we remember what we are the other 364 days of the year.

-Mark Twain