Well, They DO Have the Same Voting Rights as Illegal Aliens!

How to Greet Your Census Worker

Okay. You sent your census form back (or maybe you didn't) and you may not have answered the questions in the Approved Government Manner™, and if they cannot get you on the phone, they may send a live, warm census worker to your door.

And I got to thinking... the census sends out forms in English, and sometimes English and Spanish and sometimes a multitude of different languages. But, I doubt that the Census workers, for the most part, are widely multilingual, and I thought that this might be a good opportunity to put that language we studied back in high school to good use.

To my knowledge, there is no law that compels anyone to speak solely in English. So, I've been thinking how I might greet any Census worker who came to my door auf Deutsch!

I imagine that the conversation might go like this:

Doorbell rings.

Me: Ja? (Yes?)

Census worker: Hi. I'm with the Census Bureau and I'm here to ask you a few questions.

Me: Können Sie Deutsch sprechen? (Can you speak German?)

Census worker: Excuse me, but do you speak English?

Me: Warum sind Sie hier? (Why are you here?)

Census worker: Is there anyone here who speaks English?

Me: Ich spreche ein bisschen English. (I speak a bit of English.) More than some, less than others! If I said, "Ich spreche nur ein bisschen English", that is, I only speak a little English, that would be a lie. I'd never lie to a Census worker!

I figure he or she will get tired of the game before I do! I'm sure some of you studied French or German, Russian, Italian or Japanese. Or if you've taken a Berlitz course or Rosetta Stone or maybe you just grew up in a bilingual community.

What's the worst that could happen? They send an interpreter over to your house? You run out of high school French before the census worker runs out of questions?

I'm not advocating that everyone do this. I'm just saying, you could...

Cross posted at Say Anything

A New Reason to Vote "Present" on the Census, Redux

We've addressed this before here:
A New Reason to Vote "Present" on the Census

H/T Move_Zig

Stand Proud For your Race on the Census!

Inspired by the best readers on the planet, when your census form asks you for your "race", write in:

NASCAR

Heh.

Cross posted at Say Anything

A New Reason to Vote "Present" on the Census

A few months back, I suggested that we all should follow Barack Obama's lead:

We should all emulate the great Senator from Illinois, Barack H. Obama, who bravely and repeatedly voted "Present" on legislation he did not want to be held accountable for his vote, or was too busy running for office to read, or didn't have the cojones to take a stand on!

We, however, should do so on principle and boldly write "Present" on any question the Census Bureau asks, that we believe to be too intrusive into our personal lives, or unnecessary on the part of the government. (Besides, it's shorter than "None of your business"!)

Now, Legal Insurrection has this on one of the questions to be asked on the census:

The Census document listing the questions which will be asked reflects a new multi-part question (beginning at page 68), which collects information regarding health care insurance coverage. Question 15 on the new Census asks whether each of the following forms of insurance apply to each person in the household:

a. Insurance through a current or former employer or union (of this person or another family member)
b. Insurance purchased directly from an insurance company (by this person or another family member)
c. Medicare, for people 65 and older, or people with certain disabilities
d. Medicaid, Medical Assistance, or any kind of government-assistance
plan for those with low incomes or a disability
f. VA (including those who have ever used or enrolled for VA health care)
e. TRICARE or other military health care
g. Indian Health Service
h. Any other type of health insurance or health coverage plan – Specify

Why is the question asked?

The U.S. Department of Health and Human Services, as well as other federal agencies, use the data from this question to more accurately distribute resources and better understand state and local health insurance needs.

Or gather ammunition to ram through a government controlled health plan? My plan to vote "Present" on all the questions (other than how many live here) still stands.

Cross posted at Say Anything

Update: Here’s what the Constitution says about the census:

”[An] Enumeration shall be made within three Years after the first Meeting of the Congress of the United States, and within every subsequent Term of ten Years, in such Manner as they shall by Law direct.

Definition of enumeration:
1577, from L. enumeratus, pp. of enumerare “to reckon up, count over, enumerate,” from ex- “from” + numerare “to count, number,” from numerus “number.”
Online Etymology Dictionary, © 2001 Douglas Harper

The Constitution says count you, not quiz you.

Vote "Present" on the Census

My friend Spartacus gave me a good idea from a comment of his on Michele Bachmann and her plans on telling the government to MYOB when it comes to asking for anything more than a simple enumeration of the population.

We should all emulate the great Senator from Illinois, Barack H. Obama, who bravely and repeatedly voted "Present" on legislation he did not want to be held accountable for his vote, or was too busy running for office to read, or didn't have the cojones to take a stand on!

We, however, should do so on principle and boldly write "Present" on any question the Census Bureau asks, that we believe to be too intrusive into our personal lives, or unnecessary on the part of the government. (Besides, it's shorter than "None of your business"!)

Our President has set the precedent! Heh.

Cross posted at Say Anything

Michele Bachmann on How to Fill Out Your Census Form

"Don't"

Outspoken Republican Rep. Michele Bachmann says she’s so worried that information from next year’s national census will be abused that she will refuse to fill out anything more than the number of people in her household.

In an interview Wednesday morning with The Washington Times “America’s Morning News,” Mrs. Bachmann, Minnesota Republican, said the questions have become “very intricate, very personal” and she also fears ACORN, the community organizing group that came under fire for its voter registration efforts last year, will be part of the Census Bureau’s door-to-door information collection efforts.

“I know for my family the only question we will be answering is how many people are in our home,” she said. “We won’t be answering any information beyond that, because the Constitution doesn’t require any information beyond that.”

Outspoken? Really? By whom? Heh. I did something similar the last census go round, where I felt the questions were intrusive and mostly none of the government's business.

If you fail to answer all the questions, expect to receive a number of phone calls and perhaps a visit from a census taker. Feel free not to answer the questions just because they ask more than once. Please contact me or this blog if this advise lands you in any hot water. I'm sure there are lots of folks across the country who will be committing minor acts of civil disobedience in regards to next year's census.

Hat tip Say Anything