(with apologies to Joni Mitchell)
Woke up, it was a Chelsea Manning, and the first thing that I heard
Was her campaign run for Senate. This little weasel is absurd.
She was court-martialed for spying, flipped the USA the bird!
Oh, won't you say you'll just go away
Utter not another word!
Woke up, it was a Chelsea Manning, and the first thing that I saw
Was a Tweet she wrote "F*ck the police", and that was the last straw.
She's a Democrat, imagine that!
She's known to break the law.
Don't get me wrong, his junk is all gone
And his tits are made of plastic!
Woke up, it was a Chelsea Manning, and the last thing that we need
is this freak inside the Senate passing laws and smoking weed.
But she's running inside Maryland, that state has gone to seed.
In Baltimore, you all know the score
It's the murders and the greed!
A primer for those not familiar with the source material:
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